Sexy Games
by Invader Jubei
Summary: Bulma and Vegeta make a wager to see who can get a date faster.....with sexy results. Poor Vegeta has no idea what he's up against. R&R pweese!
1. Default Chapter

Jubei: Okay, this story is weird, but I have insomnia and I am bored so this is what you get! Vegeta's a little OOC in some parts but just bear with me...  
  
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The sun shone brightly down on the snow covered ground in front of Capsule Corp. It was a beautiful winter day. And Bulma was bored. She tapped her finger repeatedly on the kitchen table and sighed as she flipped through the pages of her "girly" magazine, as Vegeta called them. She had been putting up Christmas decorations all day and the whole house looked like Santa's Workshop when she finished. Now with nothing better to do, she sat at the table waiting for Vegeta to finish his training for the day so she would at least have someone to talk to. Even if it was Vegeta.  
  
Finally, he came through the door and Bulma jumped at the sight. There was Vegeta standing in the doorway, dripping with blood that flowed from the huge gash in his left shoulder. He glanced at her and took a deep breath before he spoke.  
  
"......Do you have a band-aid?"  
  
Bulma laughed a little and so did Vegeta which surprised her. I guess he realized how pitiful he must have looked, dripping blood all over the tile kitchen floor. He breathed heavy again and leaned himself against the doorway for balance.  
  
"You better get yourself cleaned up before mom sees you. And you better hope to Kami that you didn't stain her new kitchen floor or she'll really kill you." Bulma said, in a not quite serious tone.  
  
Vegeta glanced down at the puddle he was making and glared at Bulma.  
  
"Hey, I'm fine by the way." He muttered sarcasticly.  
  
Bulma rolled her eyes and sighed. "God, you are such a baby." She growled as she stomped off to find Vegeta something to stop the flow of blood. Vegeta watched her walk out of the room.  
  
"...Am not." He grumbled under his breath.  
  
Bulma returned a minute later with a large white towel which she threw at Vegeta's head. He snatched it off his head and stared at it.  
  
"Sorry, we're fresh out of 'gaping wound' size band-aids, so just use that." Bulma stated as she sat back down and picked up her magazine.  
  
"Has anyone ever told you that you should be a nurse? Really, you should." Vegeta replied, laying the sarcasm on so thick you could cut it with a knife.  
  
Bulma was about to reply, but she noticed how late it was.  
  
"Hey, what time is it?" She asked. Vegeta shrugged.  
  
"What do I look like? Big Ben? Try looking at the clock."  
  
It was 5:30 pm. Bulma dropped her magazine and rushed outside. Curious, Vegeta followed her. She stopped at the fence that divided her yard and her neighbor's yard. She peered over the wood panels and didn't notice Vegeta standing right next to her.  
  
"What are you doing?"  
  
Bulma jumped. "God, you scared the crap out of me. Go away, I'm busy." With that, she waved her hand toward the house, motioning for Vegeta to leave, then turned her attention back to staring intently over the fence.  
  
"What in Kami's name are you doing, woman?"  
  
Bulma gasped and ducked behind the fence as to not be seen.  
  
"Shhh! There he is, get down!" She whispered, grabbing Vegeta by the front of his shirt and pulling him down behind the fence.  
  
"Who is that?" Vegeta whispered, straining to see through a knothole in the fence.  
  
He referred to a very hansome man next door, taking out his trash.  
  
Bulma sighed and leaned with her back against the fence.  
  
"His name is Keith. He just moved in next door." She said in a dreamy voice.  
  
Vegeta groaned and rolled his eyes.  
  
"You know, some people would call this stalking. Why not go over there and talk to him instead of peeping through a fence."  
  
Bulma winced. "I can't."  
  
Vegeta just laughed as he got up to leave.  
  
"Humans are such cowards."  
  
Bulma got up to follow him.  
  
"I'm not a coward! And anyway, at least I can get dates! If a pretty girl ever talked to you, you'd proabably pee your pants!"  
  
Vegeta stopped walking and whipped around to face the one that had just insulted him.  
  
"Are you saying I can't get a date?"  
  
Bulma smirked. "I'm saying you travel in large groups of one."  
  
"Hey! I can get any girl I want! I am the prince of the Saiya-Jins! And anyway, you talk to me every day."  
  
Bulma had to think about what he had just said to her.  
  
"Did you just call me pretty?"  
  
Vegeta sweatdropped.  
  
"Uh, no. I was just saying I could get a date if I wanted to."  
  
A smirk crossed Bulma's face .  
  
"Care to make a little wager?"  
  
Vegeta cocked an eyebrow.  
  
"What kind of wager?"  
  
"First one to get a date wins. If you win, I'll make those training droids that you wanted."  
  
Vegeta glared.  
  
"And if you win?"  
  
"If I win, you have to spar with Goku...."  
  
Vegeta smiled, he did that almost everyday anyway.  
  
"....in a dress."  
  
Vegeta's smile dissapeared and was replaced with his jaw practicly hitting the floor. But he was confident in his abilities and agreed.  
  
"Man Vegeta, are you in trouble." Came a voice from behind the two.  
  
"Oh hey Yamucha! Didn't see ya there." Bulma exclaimed.  
  
"Hey, I just came to ask if you're still having that party on friday."  
  
"Yup, it's still on. You're going to come, right?"  
  
Yamucha smiled. "Wouldn't miss it for the world." Then turning to Vegeta. "I can't believe you bet Bulma that you could get a date faster than her." He laughed.  
  
Vegeta was not amused by being laughed at and made it clear by giving Yamucha a death stare.  
  
"Trust me, human, I am not worried in the least."  
  
Yamucha ignored him and bent over to whisper something to Bulma.  
  
"Hey, do that thing that makes all the guys down at the feild go crazy. It'll be really funny." He whispered. Bulma giggled and nodded. Vegeta looked confused.  
  
Bulma took a slow step toward vegeta with a strange look in her eyes. She spoke in her sexiest voice.  
  
"So, you're saying that I'm not attractive enough to get a date?"  
  
"No, I'm saying you're a hideous beast and I can't imagine why anyone would want to be near you, let alone touch you." Vegeta sneered.  
  
Bulma stepped closer and closed the gap between them. She began to run her finger along his chest as she peered up at him with her big, sparkly eyes.  
  
"Aww, I don't think you mean that."  
  
Vegeta laughed in his mind.  
  
"This is pathetic. She thinks she can seduce me. Ha!" He thought with a smirk.  
  
"Trust me, I do mean it."  
  
Bulma realized that if she was going to win this, she'd have to pull out the big guns. She slowly undid her pony tail and let her blue hair fall on her shoulders as she unbuttoned the top two buttons on her shirt, revealing quite a lot.  
  
Vegeta swallowed hard, but maintained his composure.  
  
"Oh come on Vegeta. You don't think I'm even a little bit attractive?"  
  
She bit her bottom lip and pouted.  
  
"Shit," Vegeta thought. "This is harder than I thought. Wait, harder? Uh oh."  
  
He gulped as he began to realize that he was getting aroused by all this.  
  
"Come on Vegeta, fight it! Think about something else. Uh, baseball, cold showers, baseball, cold showers." He was trying to keep himself under control by thinking of anything unsexy when Bulma did the dirtiest trick in her arsenal.  
  
"Oh, Vegeta. Mmmm." She moaned.  
  
Needless to say, that did the trick. Vegeta was completly aroused. He could barely fight his urge to throw her down on the ground and have his way with her right there. Franticly, he began to scream.  
  
"Margret Thatcher naked on a cold day! Margret Thatcher naked on a cold day!"  
  
Bulma just laughed her sexy little laugh.  
  
"I knew you couldn't resist me."  
  
Yamucha had to use all his self control not to fall over with laughter.  
  
Bulma slowly slid her arms around Vegeta's neck and pulled herself close.  
  
"What is she doing?" Vegeta wondered. "She already knows she won, why won't she back off?"  
  
He paniced as Bulma inched her way closer and closer until her lips were practicly on his and kissed him lightly. Vegeta closed his eyes and returned the kiss until she pulled away and whispered in his ear.  
  
"Let the games begin." With that, she let go of him and and an evil grin appeared on her face.  
  
Vegeta was stunned from what had just happened.  
  
"Like I said, you're in trouble." Yamucha patted him on the shoulder and he and Bulma headed back toward the house, leaving a very confused, very aroused Vegeta standing in the yard by himself.  
  
Bulma sighed. Well, there's something he won't forget anytime soon."  
  
"Yeah," Yamucha replied. "Either that or you just turned him on and sent him on a skootch hunt."  
  
Bulma's smile faded. "....Crap."  
  
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Jubei: Okay, that was the first chappie! Let me know whatcha think thus far. R&R pweeese! 


	2. The Effects of Weed on a Siayjin Prince

"Bored, bored, bored, bored, BORED!" Grumbled Vegeta from his spot on the end of the couch. It has been two days since he and Bulma had make their bet and after two days of getting shot down, he was in no mood to out hunting today. He would have trained, but two days of getting slapped and kicked in the balls had left him pretty sore.  
  
Bulma wasn't having much luck either. She had been to every bar in town wearing her tightest little black mini skirt, but still no takers.  
  
"Maybe all the bars in town went queer or something." She thought, trying to give a reason to why she was still dateless.  
  
"WOMAN!!"  
  
She heard the scream from the living room and walked in only to find Vegeta spralled on the couch, tugging on the "Do not remove under penaly to law" tag on the cusion.  
  
"Woman, I'm bored."  
  
Bulma rolled her eyes and shrugged.  
  
"Well, what do you expect me to do about it?"  
  
"Nothing, I just thought I'd let you know." Vegeta sighed.  
  
Bulma growled as she sat down, she was bored too. She let out an irritated sigh and reached into her jeans pocket.  
  
"You know, I was saving this for the party, but since we both have nothing better to do..."  
  
She pulled out a long white stick and held it in front of Vegeta.  
  
"That little thing will cure boredom?"  
  
"You'd be surprised. Come on, we can't smoke in here, we have to go down to the basement or Mom will smell it and kill me." She hopped off the couch and headed for the basement, Vegeta followed, still unsure of exactly how a white stick would be entertaining.  
  
Bulma jumped down the last couple stairs and planted herself in an old recliner. She had arranged the basement as a quiet little smoke-out area for her and her friends. Vegeta pulled up an old bar stool and sat down across from her. Bulma put the stick to her lips and lit the end with her 'Bad Girl' zippo. She took a deep breath, held it for a minute and blew a ploom of smoke above Vegeta's head.  
  
"Here, just inhale and hold it in for a few seconds." She coughed, handing the joint to Vegeta.  
  
He followed her intructions and a few seconds later, he was coughing hystericlly. Bulma laughed.  
  
"Take it easy, don't take such big hits or your lungs will cave in."  
  
Still coughing, he passed the joint back to Bulma.  
  
***An hour later***  
  
"Okay, ready?" Vegeta sneered as he locked hands with Bulma.  
  
"Yeah, ready."  
  
"One two three four, I declare a thumb war!"  
  
The two thumb wrestled, twisting around, trying to keep from getting pinned when suddenly Bulma jerked her arm sideways and pulled Vegeta off the rickity bar stool he had been sitting on. He hit the hard basement floor with a "thud."  
  
Bulma tried to keep from laughing.  
  
"Sorry! Are you okay?"  
  
Vegeta just laughed.  
  
"HA, I am a saiya-jin! You couldn't possibly hurt me." He tried to stand up and whinned. "Ow, I think I broke my ass bone." He fell back on the floor on his back, rolling with laughter. Bulma spun around in her relciner, giggling with her arms in the air.  
  
"Man Vegeta, you gotta get stoned with me more often. It's nice having a smoking buddy. Usually I'm down here by myself."  
  
Vegeta made a pouty face. "Well why didn't you ever ask me before?"  
  
"Because you're usually being an ass."  
  
Vegeta was deep in thought for a moment.  
  
"Well, my ass is broken now thanks to you, so now I guess I can't be an ass anymore." He said, matter of factly.  
  
Bulma roared with laughter. The Saiya-jin prince was a lot nicer to be around when he was baked. Bulma took a deep breath and watched Vegeta stand up quickly.  
  
"Hey, I'm hungry."  
  
"Yeah, me too."  
  
The two headed up the stairs to the kitchen. After they were done emptying the contents of all the cubboards, the two headed into the living room. Vegeta immediatly flopped himself on the couch, clutching a Cosco size bag of Gummie Worms and Bulma sat down next to him and grabbed the remote.  
  
***A couple hours later***  
  
"Bulma? You home?" Goku called through the cracked open front door. No answer.  
  
"Vegeta?" He called again and listened. Still no answer. He decide that they were probably somewehre where they couldn't hear him and headed inside to find them. Krillin, who was standing behind him on the front porch, followed.  
  
"Wonder where they are."  
  
Goku thought for a moment and realized that he might be interuppting something. According to what that Trunks kid had said, those two should be getting together fairly soon. He stopped dead in his tracks when he entered the living room. There was the mighty saiya-jin prince, laying on the couch with his head hanging over the edge fast alseep with Bulma laying practiclly on top of him. Goku's grin went ear to ear.  
  
Krillin peaked out from behind Goku so see why he had stopped. He saw what made him stop and could barely contain his laughter.  
  
"Is that not the cutest thing you've ever seen or what?" Goku whispered, making sure that he didn't wake up either of them.  
  
"How in the hell....? Damn, Bulma's pretty brave to be laying on him like that. That's like napping on a sleeping lion." Krillin replied, keeping his voice down.  
  
"A sedated lion is more like it. Look." Goku laughed as he bent down and picked up the roach that Bulma had dropped next to the couch.  
  
"Krillin, we had better get out of here before they wake up or..." He was cut short by a loud yawn coming from Vegeta. Goku and Krillin froze.  
  
Vegeta shifted under the sleeping Bulma, but didn't wake up. Instead, he stretched and wrapped his free arm around Bulma's waist. Goku breathed a sigh of relief and started tip toeing backwards, motioning for Krillin to follow. They turned around to head for the door when Vegeta's voice startled them.  
  
"What the hell are you two doing here?!?"  
  
Goku sweatdropped and Krillin jumped behind him to hide.  
  
"Uh, We were just wondering if you wanted to spar, but we can see that you're busy, we'll come back later, maybe. See ya." Goku said quickly as he and Krillin flew out the front door, slamming it behind them.  
  
Vegeta just rolled his eyes. "Bakas..." He then noticed the reason they were acting so weird. Bulma was still asleep on top of him and he had is arm around her. He immedietly remedied this by standing up and letting Bulma fall to the floor.  
  
"Ow, shit!" Bulma moaned, eyes still closed. She streched and opened her eyes only to see a very angry siaya-jin prince hovering above her.  
  
:"What the hell Vegeta?!?"  
  
"What the hell yourself woman?! Why were you using me as your personal pillow?" He growled.  
  
Bulma rubbed her head and stood up.  
  
"Jeez, sorry! I fell asleep, and....and you're comfy." She muttered under her breath. Vegeta crossed his arms and gave her a super death glare.  
  
"Out of my sight in three seconds...One....Two..."  
  
"Hey! Would you stop being such a jerk for like, a minute. How about, 'Hey, thanks for the smoke-out Bulma' You know that shit isn't easy to come by and...."  
  
Vegeta took a quick step toward her and began to power up. Bulma realized he was more pissed than usual and took this opportunity to leave him alone for a while.  
  
"...I'm gone." She said as she took off running out the front door. 


End file.
